Growing up, I've been taught the cruel "reality" that if I am too happy today, then I'd be sad tomorrow. Life's worth of happiness is so limited that we'd ought to be careful when and how much to feel it, so they say. To me, that's just cruel. Does this mean that I am always to dread the post-effect of my happiness? That we can never be truly happy without having to think of what will come next?
I'd just recently been overwhelmed with happiness and gratitude to my Father that right now, I'm not feeling sad, but dreading what unfortunate thing will come next. This is no good a habit and must be totally rid off. It is during this vulnerable time that I think and ask, "Where will life take me?"
At twenty-four, I am actually pretty blessed - my family's with me, I live in such a beautiful place, I am starting to establish a grounded relationship with God, I have a good job, friends surround me, and I have friends back home who never forget to communicate and tell me I am missed. Life is good. God has always been good. This kind of life was just a distant dream before. I remember just imagining living in Richmond and telling my friends how it is here, driving around the city in my own car, having the things I've dreamed of - and here I am actually living all these. It is amazing how dreams can come true. Of course, that is not to say I didn't like it in Manila. I loved it there. It is a big part of who I am, helped give me friends that I will now treasure for the rest of my life, and taught me life's lessons I couldn't have learned any other way.
As I write this, an epiphany hit me, it's like He spoke. I am only 24, it is not the end of the world. I am just beginning my life-long journey. I need not know where I will be going, I only need to know that my Father is in control. I am in good hands and will always be. It is written:
"My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts," says the Lord. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts."Isaiah 55:8-9
As I've said before, "I am where God wants me to be." His will brought me here and I will continue submitting to Him. Definitely, God's way.